Why Doesn’t God Talk to Me? 2 Unexpected Reasons + 3 Simple Solutions
Inside: Do you say fervent prayers for guidance but are left wondering, “Why doesn’t God talk to me?” Discover 2 reasons He may seem to be on mute. Plus 3 ways to break the wall of silence right now.
For about 2 decades, I felt like I was hanging out in God’s waiting room. With every fiber of my being, I yearned for Him to talk to me about His purpose for my life. For the first few years of those 2 decades, my ears tingled in anticipation of what He would say.
But eventually, my anticipation gave way to confusion. Because it seemed like God wasn’t talking to me. About anything.
It didn’t make sense. I was open and willing to do what He wanted. So why on Earth didn’t God talk to me?
As it turns out, He was talking up a storm…for the entire 2 decades.
And I was tuned out…for all of it.
Bonus: As a bonus for joining my weekly newsletter, get this free printable download—The Hearing God Cheat Sheet. It gives you 6 guaranteed signs He’s speaking to you, so you can stop missing it.
Why Doesn’t God Speak to Me?
And now you’re where I was for those 20-ish years. Feeling like you’re hanging out in God’s waiting room—maybe over a job, a calling, or a relationship. Heck, you may be waiting there, wondering how to know if God supports a decision you’re faced with.
You’ve been on your knees begging Him, “Lord, talk to me! Please!” And now you’re confused about why He seems silent.
Here’s the good news up front: God speaks…a lot.
Long ago God spoke many times and in many ways to our ancestors through the prophets. And now in these final days, he has spoken to us through his Son.
Hebrews 1:1-2a (NLT)
So if He speaks—and if He hears our prayers—why doesn’t God talk to you?
Well…He does. You just weren’t aware of it for two reasons.
1. Why Doesn’t God Talk to Me? You Don’t Know How to Recognize His Voice
One of the biggest reasons you may wonder, “Why doesn’t God talk to me?” is that you don’t know how to tell when He’s speaking to you.
For God speaks again and again, though people do not recognize it.
Job 33:14 (NLT)
This means God may talk to you in ways you don’t expect, or through people you don’t expect. And it’s up to you to get familiar with signs God is speaking to you.
But this doesn’t have to be hard. You can learn to recognize God’s voice so you know when He’s talking to you. And you can learn to distinguish it from the noise around you.
As Jesus said:
My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me.
John 10:27 (ESV)
So how do you do this? You learn to know God when is talking to you by getting closer to Him.
Related: The 21-Day Getting to Know God Devotional
You do it by learning about who He is, the types of things He says, and the standards He holds for you.
2. Why Doesn’t God Talk to Me? You’re Ignoring His Answer
It’s a part of human nature to ignore or discount when others say things we don’t want to hear.
But they refused to listen and turned a rebellious and stubborn shoulder and made heavy and dull their ears that they might not hear.
Zechariah 7:11 (AMPC)
And you may be doing this very thing with God.
You see, He may be giving you an answer you don’t want to hear. He may be telling you no, He may be telling you to wait, or He may be telling to you take a path you don’t like the looks of. None of which you want to hear.
So you ignore His answer and keep torturing yourself, wondering, “Why doesn’t God talk to me already?!”
Related: 4 Sure Signs God Is Answering Your Prayers
This was what I did back when I was hanging out in God’s waiting room, willing Him to magic up a burning bush in front of me with His calling for my life clearly spelled out above it.
Meanwhile, He planted a desire in my heart that was the answer I sought from Him. He gave me one little thread which, if I’d had the courage to tug on it, would have led me to His purpose for me lickety-split.
But the gift He gave me looked stupid to the world and I let their judgment of it matter more than following the path He was laying out for me. So do you know what I did?
I buried what He gave me under a pile of embarrassment and shame, hauled myself back to God’s waiting room, and spent the next 2 decades wondering why on Earth God didn’t talk to me.
You may be doing the same thing.
But First, Hear This
The truth is, you can stop asking why God doesn’t talk to you since—as He did with me—He’s probably been talking up a storm this whole time.
You simply need to learn how to listen for His voice. And you need to accept His answer, even when it’s not what you want to hear.
This last one can be especially hard because it requires you to want God’s will more than you:
- Want the thing you asked God for.
- Care about others’ opinions on His answer.
- Want to stay in your comfort zone.
You see, when God talks to you, His answer to whatever you asked will very likely require you to be courageous. This is because you’ll need to step out in ways that feel uncomfortable to you.
It’s how God stretches and grows you into the confident Christian woman of impact He created you to be.
How Can I Get God to Talk to Me?
By now you know the good news—you don’t have to get God to talk to you. He already talks to you all the time!
Instead, let’s talk about 3 of the most common ways He speaks so you can start picking up what He’s putting down.
But remember—God isn’t limited in how He talks to you. He’s our Almighty God of the universe who can talk to you in any way He wants, at any time He wants.
For example, as a born-again, baptized believer in Jesus Christ, God may speak to you through His Holy Spirit, who lives in you.
Still, you can use these 3 ways as a jumping-off point to start getting familiar with when God is talking to you.
1. God Talks to You through His Word
One of the simplest and most straightforward ways God talks to His people is through His word.
He’s given you the gift of your Bible so you can get to know Him—His unchanging attributes, how He operates, His plans for His people, and the kind of life He wants you to live.
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.
Psalm 119:105 (ESV)
Become a student of the Word. Read and study it often so you get to know your Creator and your Savior.
When you get to know God through His word—when you pray for a closer relationship with God and go deep with Him—you’ll find it much easier to hear when He’s talking to you.
2. God Talks to You through Desires He Plants in Your Heart
The whole time I was begging God to talk to me, to tell me His calling on my life, He was trying to turn my attention to a desire He’s planted in my heart from my early years.
Even though I’d buried that desire out of shame over others’ judgment of it, every time I prayed for an answer, a need tugged at me to follow it up.
But I didn’t see how it could possibly connect to a purpose. Plus, I cared much more about people laughing at my dreams. So I ignored it, and that’s on me.
Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding. In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6 (AMPC)
I’ve even heard one Bible teacher say they asked God for more energy and He gave them a desire to exercise more. When they followed this desire, they ended up feeling more energetic.
One word of warning, though. Check the desire of your heart against God’s standards for godliness. If what you want is ungodly, it’s not God talking to you.
Bonus: As a bonus for joining my weekly newsletter, get this free printable download—The Hearing God Cheat Sheet. It gives you 6 guaranteed signs He’s speaking to you, so you can stop missing it.
3. God Talks to You through Wise Counsel
Sometimes, God uses a wise counselor or friend to say something when you’re waiting for Him to talk to you.
Take good counsel and accept correction—that’s the way to live wisely and well.
Proverbs 19:20 (NLT)
You may get their wise advice through a casual conversation or by asking for their take on your specific situation.
However you get it, keep 2 things in mind when it comes to counsel from others.
First, check that their counsel is godly. If it isn’t—if it goes against what God says in His word—it’s not advice you need to be following. And it sure isn’t wise.
Second, their wise counsel may be godly, but it also not be what you want to hear. If this is so, don’t fall prey to the temptation to ignore God talking to you just because you’re not getting the answer you want.
Get Your Free Printable Cheat Sheet for Hearing God
Lack of knowledge can make you mute God while you keep wondering, “Why doesn’t God talk to me?” But you can learn how to hear Him.
Use this cheat sheet as a guide to help you recognize when God is talking to you. You’ll get the 6 Scripture-based signs, plus related Bible verses for each sign.
- Get the free guide. You’ll get the printable guide and join my weekly newsletter. Just click here to get it and subscribe.
- Print. Any type of paper will do.
- Keep your guide where you can easily grab it when you need it, like with your Bible or prayer journal.
Here’s a sneak peek of your free printable guide:
What to Do When God Isn’t Talking To You
I lingered in God’s waiting room for 2 decades, desperate for Him to talk to me about His calling for my life.
But as it turns out, I could have been out of there in the blink of an eye—or never been there in the first place—because He had several words for me. If only I’d:
- Known how to recognize God’s voice so I could tell when He was talking to me.
- Stopped ignoring God talking to me, just because He was saying what I didn’t want to hear.
- Had the courage to care more about His will than about others’ opinions of it.
Because I didn’t do or know these things, I wasted 20 years, cried countless tears, and almost lost my faith that God loves me.
All because I had no clue how to hear Him or how to be brave enough to heed what He was saying to me.
But you don’t have to waste 20 years—or even one more minute!—wondering, “Why doesn’t God talk to me?”
You can get up off your knees and stop begging, “Lord, talk to me, please!” Instead:
My darling, God’s been talking to you this whole time. All you need to do is get quiet and listen.
Before you go, get your FREE printable download to help conquer your confusion—The Essential Guide to Finding Clarity.