3 Simple Strategies to Find the Best Answers for What Makes You Happy

Inside: Forget the cookie-cutter what makes you happy answers; they never work for more than a hot minute. These 3 simple but powerful strategies give you the customized answers you need to find lasting joy.

As the old year ticked over into the new one, the festive air rang with our laughter.

The boom and flash of fireworks in the distance interrupted our exuberant well wishes for the new year ahead. The dazzling spectacle drew us to the balcony railing, trying to get closer from so far away.

The moment seemed perfect.

I was an executive at a top corporation, in a long-term relationship with an attractive, desirable man. And I was welcoming the new year—surrounded by friends and family—from my house on the hill overlooking the city, with my luxury car parked in the driveway.

Yes, it all looked perfect.

But behind the façade, I was drowning in misery while faking like I was happy.

I hated my corporate job, felt unappreciated and unloved in my relationship, and chained to my beautiful, unhappy life by the very things I’d worked so hard to accomplish.

As I watched the fireworks that New Year’s, I didn’t want to be miserable anymore. But I was clueless about how to find answers to what would make me happy. Since then, I’ve gone on a journey to discover those answers for myself.

Here’s what I’ve learned. It will help you find your own perfect answers.

Bonus: As a bonus for joining my weekly newsletter, get this free printable download—The Essential Guide to Finding Clarity. It gives you 7 revealing questions to help break through your fog of confusion and decide what to do now.

Answering The Question: What Makes Me Happy?

Whether you’re on the cusp of a new year or a new day—heck, even a new minute—it’s a great time to find answers to what makes you happy. Especially if you can’t remember that last time you felt true happiness.

If you check in with yourself and find that you’re happy—that you feel pleasure and enjoyment from your current life situation—then keep doing more of what you’re doing.

But if you find that you’re unhappy, it’s probably because—as I did on my balcony during that New Year’s celebration—you know deep inside that you’re not living the life you secretly ache for.

I certainly didn’t want to be trapped in a job I hated. And I sure didn’t want to be in a relationship where I wasn’t respected. But I stayed in both because I’d lost touch with what made me happy. And by doing that, I’d lost sight of the God-given dreams I had for my life.

So have you, which is why you’re now looking for answers to what makes you happy.

But real talk: the best answers to what makes you happy are the ones you discover for yourself. They’re the ones you find when you create your personal, customized definition of happiness.

In a minute, I’ll guide you on how to find those answers.

But First, a Warning

While most people know what happiness feels like, everyone experiences it in different ways. So what makes other people happy tells you nothing about what makes you happy.

For example, you may feel happy hiking a mountain trail, while your friends wouldn’t be caught dead outside the city limits. Or you may find joy in the pages of a book on Friday night after a long workweek. Meanwhile, your partner is on top of the world when he’s hitting up the club and staying out all night.

Don’t waste your time looking at the people around you who seem happy, then go out and try to find happiness by doing what they’re doing. You don’t know if their beaming, Insta-worthy grin is hiding misery.

Plus, even if they truly are happy, you have no guarantee that what makes them happy will make you happy too.

Bottom line: When you’re looking for answers to what makes you happy, stay out of other people’s business and focus on your own.

Bonus: As a bonus for joining my weekly newsletter, get this free printable download—The Essential Guide to Finding Clarity. It gives you 7 revealing questions to help break through your fog of confusion and decide what to do now.

4 Pitfalls to Avoid as You Seek Answers to What Makes You Happy

As you get ready to unearth what makes you happy, let’s talk about 4 traps lying in wait for you. When you know to look out for these joy killers, you can avoid them and succeed in finding the answers you’re seeking.

1. Don’t diminish what you want.

In your search for answers to what makes you happy, you need to be unflinchingly honest with yourself.

If you’re not, you’ll stay stuck in misery while you keep copying what makes other people happy.

When you come at your quest with honesty, you’ll find all sorts of dreams you forgot about. Some of which may not look like everyone else’s.

Be careful not to cringe away from or dismiss these answers. They could make you happy.

The path to your joy may well lie in what you scoff at because you’re afraid they’re impossible or seem silly.

Related: What To Do When You Just Want To Be Happy Again

2. Don’t abandon yourself.

I’m willing to bet that the answers to what makes you happy won’t look at all like what makes the people you’re hanging out with happy.

If they did, you’d be lounging on cloud nine with them right now instead of looking for how to find what makes you happy answers.

Here’s the thing. When you find those answers, the people around you may not have good things to say about them. They may say something is wrong with you and with your dreams for happiness.

But that’s OK.

You don’t have to let others’ judgment about what makes you happy steal your joy. Their judgment is their business, not yours.

So don’t let their skepticism and negativity cause you to turn your back on the answers you find.

3. Don’t buy these lies.

The world is selling a lie that when you do what makes your soul happy, you’ll be the queen of Easy Street, with a garden that’s coming up nothing but roses.

Lie!

Since we live in a fallen world, no one’s life is ever perfect or completely problem-free. No one. Jesus Himself said so.

So do yourself a favor and get rid of the Easy Street idea right now. Otherwise, when going after your answer for what makes you happy feels like your rose garden is nothing but thorns, you’ll abandon it before you can say, “Ouch, I got stuck!”

Another trap waiting to swallow you whole is one your church friends are probably feeding you. It’s the lie that doing what makes you happy is selfish. Surely, you should be doing what serves and benefits others, not selfishly looking out for your happiness.

Lie!

As a born-again believer in Jesus Christ, God has a plan for your life that includes you serving others and being happy.

For we are God’s [own] handiwork (His workmanship), [a]recreated in Christ Jesus, [born anew] that we may do those good works which God predestined (planned beforehand) for us [taking paths which He prepared ahead of time], that we should walk in them [living the good life which He prearranged and made ready for us to live].

Ephesians 2:10 (AMPC)

Don’t get ensnared by either of these dream-stealing lies.

4. Don’t be confused.

But wait!

Don’t get carried away thinking you now have a license to do whatever you want.

Yes, you should do what makes you happy because that’s where you’ll find the path to God’s plan for your life.

But if what makes you happy is ungodly or unwholesome, it’s not what God wants for you.

Ungodly, unwholesome things won’t make you happy in the long run.

Sure, you may feel good in the moment. But your willful indulgence in what’s wrong in God’s eyes will create an agonizing abyss between you and Him.

How to Find Your Perfect What Makes You Happy Answers

So how do you figure out what makes you happy?

Forget taking a what makes you happy quiz. It won’t work because it’ll give you a formulaic answer based on what makes other people happy. And as we already agreed, others’ answers won’t bring you happiness.

Don’t bother downloading the latest Ultimate List of If It Makes You Happy Quotes. You can’t use them to pep-talk yourself into happiness since they don’t answer the question of what makes you happy in the first place.

If you want to know what makes you happy, you need to go within and get the answers you’re seeking from yourself and God. Because only you and He know what will unleash true joy in your life.

Here are 3 simple but powerful strategies for finding the best answers for you.

1. Visit Happy You in the Future

Open the Notes app on your phone, or grab your journal or a piece of paper. Head up your new note “Happy Me.”

Next, pray and ask the Holy Spirit for divine answers to what will bring you joy. Remember, wanting what God wants for you is your best bet for finding answers to what makes you happy which will saturate your soul.

Where there is no vision [no redemptive revelation of God], the people perish; but he who keeps the law [of God, which includes that of man]—blessed (happy, fortunate, and enviable) is he.

Proverbs 29:18 (AMPC)

Now, close your eyes and imagine you’re so happy, you can almost feel the rainbow sparkles shooting from your pores.

• Where are you?
• What are you doing?
• Who are you with?
• Open up your senses: what do you see, smell, hear, taste, and feel?
• When is it?

Then write down everything you experience as you take yourself to that happy place and time. No matter how impossibly big or ridiculously small it seems, write it down.

If you feel stuck, bring Happy You front and center in your mind again and ask her what makes her happy. Interview her; she may have surprising wisdom to share with you.

Once you’re done visioning, review what you’ve written to see if any themes emerge. For example, using your creative muscles or a fascination with other cultures. These can help spark more answers for what might make you happy.

2. Visit Happy You in the Past

Grab your journal, piece of paper, or Notes app again. This time head it up “5 Things That Made Me Happy.”

Start with only 5 so you feel less pressure to solve your unhappiness problem in one sitting. But if you can think of more now, great! Add them to the list. If you think of more later, add them then.

Again, before you start, pray and ask the Holy Spirit to bring to your mind forgotten things that brought you joy. Then write down everything that comes up.

• Where were you?
• What were you doing?
• Who were you with?
• What did you see, smell, hear, taste, and feel?
• When was it?

Discard nothing as too trivial. Even that one time you sat undisturbed on a log at the top of a hill in the crisp morning air, quietly ecstatic as you watched the sun creep across the horizon, the sky exploding in a kaleidoscope of colors accompanied by a birdsong serenade.

Because now you know that you like quiet time, nature, and occasional solitude.

If you feel stuck, dig around in your childhood memories for what made you happy then. What you find may surprise, delight, and inspire you.

Again, when you’ve finished making your list, scan it for themes. Also, check if any old dreams resurfaced. They’re easy to dismiss but can be critical in finding answers to what can make you happy long-term.

Your old, abandoned dreams often hide the first clue and step towards your God-given dream life, which is where you’ll find the ultimate answer to what makes you happy.

3. Mine for Happiness Answers in Your Now

Another way to find what makes you happy answers is to dig into your current life. This strategy gives you a quick win to help bolster your flagging spirits.

Sure, your life isn’t all rainbows and unicorns. But it’s probably not all doom and gloom either, no matter how unhappy you are. So let’s dig up some of what makes you happy now.

Beware, though: this isn’t a gratitude list.

When you’re drowning in misery, a gratitude list is like a leaky life preserver. It looks like it should solve your problem but only makes you feel ungrateful for your blessings, and selfish for wanting more. It only drowns you in more misery.

Avoid gratitude lists like the plague. They’re not what you need right now. You can make a gratitude list after you start finding answers to what makes you happy.

Instead, ask yourself questions about what makes you happy now. You’re looking for a quick win by unearthing one gem which currently brings you even a small spark of joy.

Then you can fan the flame by doing more of what makes your soul happy now.

Related: How To Fall In Love With Your Life Again

Before You Start Chasing What Makes You Happy

Woo-hoo! You’ve done the work to find answers to what makes you happy. Time to run out and start checking things off your brand-spanking new happiness list, right?

Well, sure…if it’s a bucket of things to do before you die.

But if you’re looking for long-term happiness, you’ll want to go over a few things first.

1. Remind yourself of those 4 pitfalls we talked about. Click here to jump to the pitfalls list. Be especially careful of people’s judgment about your newly discovered answers to what makes you happy. Guard those ideas like the precious gift they are.
2. Choose one answer from your list of what makes you happy and decide to go all-in with it. Do you want to paint? Enroll in an art class at your local community college. Do you want to travel? Choose one place you’ve longed to visit and book the ticket.
3. Things won’t always go exactly as planned because the world is imperfect. Expect and be OK with this truth. Then when one path to your happy dream doesn’t pan out, you’ll stay focused on the dream and pivot your plan.

If you follow these steps, you’ll find joy in the journey to what makes you happy.

Get Your Free Printable Guide for Your Next Step

When you’re eager to find answers to what makes you happy, don’t copy what everyone else is doing and expect to find joy. Use this printable guide to chart your very own journey to your dreams.

1. Get the free guide. You’ll get the printable guide and join my weekly newsletter. Just click here to get it and subscribe.
2. Print the guide and put it to work. Use the 7 coaching-style questions to help conquer your confusion and get some answers about what to do now.
3. Stay focused on what makes you happy. Don’t get distracted by others’ opinions about your dreams. Keep your eyes focused on going after what God has for you.

Here’s a sneak peek of the free printable clarity finder:

Your Action List

As I stood on the balcony that New Year’s night, I didn’t have answers for what would make me happy. All I knew was, I felt inept at work, unworthy at home, and trapped in my good-looking, misery-riddled life.

My emotional health was in shambles and none of the gazillion hobbies, self-help books, and misery-inducing gratitude practices I tried worked.

But you don’t have to waste your time on all those sure-to-fail duds. Instead, get with God—and yourself—to create the perfect answer to what makes you happy.

When you do, you’ll start your new year or new day—heck, even your next new minute—with fresh dreams and new energy to go after what makes you happy.

Before you go, get your FREE printable download to help conquer your confusion—The Essential Guide to Finding Clarity.

Did you love it? Please share it!